Hit Man Picked hitmanforhire.net To Promote Services

You can order a bouquet of roses on flowers.com, a novel from books.com and new lenses from contacts.com. So why shouldn't you be able to put a price on someone's head using hitmanforhire.net? Don't laugh — because a man really was foolish enough to offer his services as a contract killer using that very domain.

Before you rush to give this fella the benefit of the doubt and suggest that he might've simply been extremely brilliant and hidden his criminal enterprise in plain sight, you should consider that even the Web developer he'd hired to build his website couldn't take him seriously. The entire tale sounds like something straight out of a funny movie.

And it might even become a funny movie. Hitmanforhire.net was recently acquired by a production company which is claiming to be working on a film about the bumbling contract killer.

We're not entirely confident that this claim will truly be followed by some sort of cinematic blockbuster as Michael Duke Productions, the company which currently owns the hitmanforhire.net domain, doesn't seem to have put much effort into crafting (or proofreading) the current site. But who knows? Even the leanest filmography can be deceptive.

Movie or no movie, we can still learn about the history of hitmanforhire.net and its original owner thanks to the LA Times' Victoria Kim, who wrote up a thorough report of the entire — and extremely bizarre — tale (which thankfully never resulted in any deaths).

The main character in the story is Essam Ahmed Eid, an Egyptian-born man who worked as a poker dealer in Las Vegas. In 2006, he suddenly decided to change careers, hiring a Florida-based man to build hitmanforhire.net. After launching the site, Eid did "what any modern-day neophyte would do with a new task." He turned to Google.

Yes, you read that right — the contract killer turned to Google to research killing methods and murder weapons. As Kim reveals:

Between numerous searches for Clay Aiken — Eid's wife was an avid fan — [an FBI agent] found records showing that Eid had surfed the Web about his new trade. He looked up how to make a homemade silencer from toilet parts, attempted to place an Internet order for cyanide, and researched ricin — the castor bean-derived poison famously used in the 1978 assassination of Bulgarian dissident journalist Georgi Markov through an umbrella gun.

It didn't take long for people to inquire about Eid's services, explains Kim. "A fifth-grade girl in Kentucky wanted another girl in her class dead. Several volunteered to kill for hire. One woman wanted help committing suicide."

Eid was in business now! But despite all the thorough research he conducted and even though he'd made highly toxic ricin powder in his garage, the man didn't seem to be keen on the idea of actually killing someone. Whenever a customer put out a hit, Eid took a cash deposit and then approached the would-be-victim with an offer to spare his or her life in exchange for an additional fee.

Naturally that's how he got caught in the end.

One of the individuals Eid attempted to extort approached the FBI after the man showed up in her home and explained that her ex-boyfriend deposited $17,000 to have her "done by a shot in the head." Eid would let her live if she paid the balance on the $37,000 job within three days. For some inexplicable reason, he gave her his real name during his strange business proposal.

The upshot, leaving out some amazing twists and turns from Kim's comedy of errors, is thatEid found himself in the middle of a six-week trial in Dublin in 2008. He was "convicted of extortion and burglary, but acquitted of solicitation of murder." He was sentenced to six years of prison time there and another 33 months after being extradited to the United States. He is currently in a federal prison in Mississippi, but may be released as early as Nov. 2013.

There's no word on when the corresponding movie will supposedly hit theaters.


LA Times: Website matches targets and hit man

Teen Allegedly Takes Mom's Car, Robs Two Banks At Drive-Through Window

A 16-year-old Utah teenager, who lives in Orem, allegedly took his mother's car and robbed two banks Saturday at the drive-through windows -- in just 20 minutes, according to the Salt Lake Tribune.

Sgt. Craig Martinez told the paper that authorities were able to get a good description of the suspect after allegedly robbing the Central Bank on State Street at noon, before hitting the First Credit Union on Main Street shortly after.

The teen, whose name has not been released, "never brandished a weapon but made inferences that he had a gun," Martinez told the Daily Herald.

Police said the suspect passed a note to tellers in a canister, before making off with the loot.

The Daily Herald reported that it was the first time he was aware of when someone had attempted to rob a Utah bank from the drive-through window, and that all of the stolen cash was recovered.

KSL reported that the teen's mother's blue toyota Corolla was located not far from the second bank, and the boy was picked up not far away. Police recovered a BB gun at another location that may have been used in the crimes.

The child's mother, at work when the crime supposedly occurred, was "definitely surprised," police told the TV station.


Huffington Post: Utah Teen Allegedly Takes Mom's Car, Robs Two Banks At Drive-Through Window

Douchebag Siri: The Fixed Apple iPhone Rock God Commercial

Man Shoots Himself In The Stomach Point Blank

Banker Leaves 1% Tip On $133 Lunch Bill

A banker left a 1% tip in defiance of 'the 99%' at a Newport Beach restaurant the other week, according to his dining companion and underling who snapped a photo of the receipt and posted it to his blog, Future Ex Banker. (the blog is now offline.)

In posting the photo, the employee gave some background on his boss and the receipt:
Mention the “99%” in my boss’ presence and feel his wrath. So proudly does he wear his 1% badge of honor that he tips exactly 1% every time he feels the server doesn’t sufficiently bow down to his Holiness. Oh, and he always makes sure to include a “tip” of his own.

The "tip" of his own in this case was to tell the server to "get a real job." What an Asshole.


Huffington Post: Banker Leaves 1% Tip On $133 Lunch Bill In Defiance of 'The 99%

Drunk Man In Wheelchair Robs Gas Station, Gets Stuck In Sand

Police in Florida arrested a disabled man whose alleged convenience store robbery ended when his wheelchair got stuck in the sand.

John Christopher Champion, 22, has been charged with armed robbery and aggravated battery.

According to Chiefland police, Champion went into the Chevron gas station on South Main Street in Chiefland Wednesday night, brandished a pocketknife and demanded cash from the register.

Champion taunted the 54-year-old clerk, the police report states, telling her to "push the panic button because the police would not arrest a handicapped person."

The clerk got into a struggle with Champion and allegedly stabbed him three times in the legs, police said, then a wounded Champion grabbed a 12-pack of beer and a roll of electrical tape, and fled the store.

When Chiefland police officer Justin Douglas arrived on the scene he found Champion behind the store. The suspect's wheelchair was stuck in the sand and he was drinking a Bud Light Lime, The Gainesville Sun reported.

According to the police report, Champion was "very intoxicated."

Police said Champion admitted to taking the items from the store, but denied robbing it. He also told police he threw the pocketknife into the woods, but officers were unable to locate the weapon.

After receiving medical treatment for his injuries, Champion was booked into the Levy County jail. Court documents do not list an attorney for Champion.


Huffington Post: John Champion Allegedly Robs Store At Knifepoint, Gets Wheelchair Stuck During Getaway

Man Drops Gun During Robbery, Returns To Try To Buy It Back

A 39-year-old man was arrested Thursday after he tried to rob two men in a motel room, dropping his gun and later returning to buy back his own firearm, Bradenton police said.

At about midnight, Cedrick Mitchell barged into a room at the Royal Motel in Bradenton. He asked the two men inside for pills.

When they said they had none, Mitchell pulled a handgun from his waistband and demanded “everything you got,” said Bradenton police Capt. Warren Merriman.

The men began to fight. During the scuffle, Mitchell dropped his gun and one of the victims pepper-sprayed him in the face.

Mitchell ran away. But moments later, he was back at the motel room and begged the two men to buy his gun back for $40, Merriman said.

Mitchell was pepper-sprayed in the face again and ran away.

The men called 911. One of the officers at the scene spotted Mitchell, who ran away again. Officers chased him and he was arrested, Merriman said.

Mitchell was booked into the Manatee County Jail and is being held on no bond. He was charged with armed home invasion and resisting an officer.


The Miami Herald: Robbery suspect drops gun, returns, offers to buy it back

UFO Phil For President

Man Loses Testicles And Part Of His Penis To Crocodile

A 70-year-old Gutu man is recuperating in a Bulawayo hospital after his testicles and part of his manhood were torn into shreds while he sustained a fractured hand and a seriously mauled back when he was attacked by a crocodile. Mr Jonah Maturure of Marutaya village, Chief Mataruse in Gutu who engaged in a fierce battle for life with the crocodile had a box of tomatoes that he was carrying to thank after he dropped it into the water and in the process turned the attention of the large reptile away from him.

In an interview with the Sunday News in his hospital bed at the United Bulawayo Hospitals (UBH) last Wednesday, Mr Maturure, who could not hide his pain said the attack was so vicious that it could have ended his life had it not been for the box of tomatoes that he decided to drop in the water.
He said he nearly met his death last month when he decided to take his tomatoes for sale across Chivake River whose water level was swelling owing to the rains that had pounded the area the previous night.

Mr Maturure said when he got to the river the water level was such that he thought he would easily cross as he had earlier on crossed through the same place. He told the News crew that he removed his trousers before getting into the river as he did not want it to get wet and was only left with his shirt and underwear. He said he put the trousers, whose pockets had some money and his identity document, in the tomato box that he was carrying on his head and got into the river whose water was at chest level.

"I was not suspecting anything. I had earlier on crossed the river using the same crossing place. But when I was almost in the middle of the river I was attacked by a crocodile. It mauled a chunk of my buttocks before attacking my manhood tearing my testicles into shreds. The skin covering my manhood was partly torn but I quickly put my thumb (showing a heavily bruised but healing thumb) in its mouth to try and chock it after realising that I was going to lose my manhood. It then grabbed my hand and I could hear my bones cracking making some cacophony noise at the slightest bite. Realising that I was losing the battle, I let go of the box of tomatoes that I was carrying on my head and it fell into the river with a thud making some kind of noise. At that instant the crocodile released its grip on my hand and ran towards the noise. It probably thought I had fallen into the river and I escaped in pain, with blood flowing down my legs from the wounds where the chunks of flesh had been incised," said Mr Maturure.

He said both his shirt and underwear were torn in the attack and the battle that ensued and when he got out of the water he was in his birthday suit with blood oozing uncontrollably from the ferocious attack wounds. He had to ask for clothes and assistance from a home a few metres from the river. He was then rushed to Chiguhune clinic where he was referred to Gutu Mission Hospital where he was further referred to UBH where his condition is now stable.

Mr Maturure said crocodiles were thrown in Nyazvidzi dam by whites who did not want the surrounding communities to fish in the dam. He said they, however, did not remove them when they went away and now they were many and moving down stream whenever it rains. He added that he was not the first victim as people from the area have constantly been attacked and maimed while some were killed by the crocodiles.


My Zimbabwe: Gutu man (70) loses testicles and part of his penis to crocodile

Belligerent Man Starts Wild Fight With Security At Disneyland

A man is repeatedly pepper sprayed and he curses loudly and often during a wild fight outside the Tower of Terror ride.

As wild as the ride might be, witnesses to the fight — involving the man, patrons, security, two bellhops — got their own wild ride Saturday just after 3:30 p.m.

It is not known what led to the wild melee. But at the start of the video, onlookers have already clearly had their fill of the agitated man.

One woman repeatedly screams at the 50-something man, “Do you know you’re at Disneyland? There are kids here! Stop! There are kids here. Does this guy not get that?”

Several patrons subdue the man who is shown punching Disneyland employees and kicking at various park goers. He slurs his words as well prompting many on-lookers to question whether the man is drunk.

In a four-minute profanity laced rant (including by some disgusted patrons) the man can be seen egging on employees to swing at him. He punches at least two park employees, one directly in the face.

After the boisterous man is downed, several park goers applaud and mock him. “He didn’t wind up being so tough, huh?” and another says “Time to go home, sir. Can you believe he’s still going?. Another adds, “look who’s now whimpering like a little baby!” and another man is heard laughing, “I think this guy has been drinking some vodka!”

Suzi Brown, a spokeswoman for Disneyland, told CBS2 and KCAL9: “Our security cast member was taken to a local hospital where he was treated for the injuries he sustained and then released. We appreciate the actions of the guests who came to his aid during this uncharacteristic incident.”

Anaheim police tell CBS2 and KCAL9 that they arrested 53-yearold Glenn L. Horlacher. He was booked at the Anaheim police department and issued a citation. It is not clear what charges, if any, Horlacher will face.

The profanity-laced video is linked on youtube under “Disney Tower of Terror Fight” but can only be accessed by youtube users who are over 21.


CBS Los Angeles: Belligerent Man Repeatedly Pepper Sprayed During Wild Fight At Disneyland

Man Tries To Evict His Mom On Her 98th Birthday

Peter Kantorowski wanted his 98-year-old mother to move into a nursing home or live with him. She wouldn't go; she didn't want to leave her home of nearly 60 years.

Finally, Kantorowski went to court – and served his mother with an eviction notice shortly before her 98th birthday in December.

Mary Kantorowski says she won't leave the small yellow house she's been in since 1953, raising her two sons and cooking for the church she attended daily. The house her late husband wanted her to stay in until she died; the house she says is her "everything."

"I don't know why he wants me to leave," she said Friday.

The epic mother-son feud is headed to court next month.

Peter Kantorowski, 71, became the owner of the Fairfield home several years ago when his mother transferred ownership to him but retained the right to live there, in what's known as a quit claim, Mary Kantorowski's attorney said.

The retired taxidermist said he's concerned about her well-being, that she's seemed disoriented and has been living in poor condition.

"I'm not throwing her on the street," he told WTNH-TV in New Haven. "At her age, at 98, I'm sure that she should be with people of her peers. She should have her meals on time."

Peter Kantorowski and his attorney didn't return telephone messages left by The Associated Press on Friday.

Mary Kantorowski's attorney, Richard Bortolot Jr., said she can take of herself, still does some of her own cooking and is seen regularly in her home by doctors and nurses. A judge ruled she was competent and appointed Bortolot to represent her in the eviction.

Her younger son, Jack Kantorowski, says his mother is in relatively good health. He's on his mother's side of the family feud.

"If there is a money problem or anything else, he should have said something a long time ago instead of just trying to get rid of his own mother," Jack Kantorowski said.

Peter Kantorowski, who lives about 20 minutes away in Trumbull, hasn't seen his mother for eight months, her attorney said.

"I'm appalled a son would do this," Bortolot said.

Jack Kantorowski said his father worked multiple jobs to buy the house and built additions over the years.

"He was always trying to protect my mom; she'd always have a place to live," he said. "If something happens to me, there was always going to be a home for her to stay for the rest of her life."

Peter Kantorowski filed a complaint against his mother in December after she refused to follow an eviction notice filed Nov. 30 to vacate the premises by Dec. 7. A trial is set to begin March 2 in Bridgeport Superior Court.

Bortolot says a probate court stopped Peter Kantorowski from trying to sell the house, valued at $330,000, after the eviction papers were served.

Asked where she might live next, Mary Kantorowski's voice catches.

"I don't feel very good about it," she says. "I want to stay right here in my own home."


Huffington Post: Man Tries To Evict His Mom, Mary Kantorowski, On Her 98th Birthday

Naked Man Walks into Walmart, Steals Socks

A man was arrested after he was seen walking around an Exton, Pa., Walmart wearing nothing but socks. It was later discovered that the only apparel the man had on was stolen from the store, police say.

Employees at Walmart called police at about 5:30 p.m. Wednesday, saying that there was a naked man walking around the store, authorities say.

When police arrived they found 32-year-old Verdon Lamont Taylor in the store wearing only socks, police say. When Taylor would not comply with officers, the 6-feet, 4-inch tall, 300-pound man was tasered and taken into custody. Taylor proceeded to spit in an officer’s face, police say.

Upon viewing surveillance video, police learned that Taylor walked into the store completely naked and walked straight to the customer service counter, stole a pair of socks there and put them on his feet.

The video also shows shoppers avoiding Taylor as he proceeded to walk through the store.

Taylor, who lives on the 100 block of East Church Street in Downingtown, Pa., was arraigned on charges of indecent exposure, aggravated assault, simple assault, retail theft, receiving stolen property and disorderly conduct.

He is being held at Chester County Prison on $50,000 cash bail.


NBC 10 Philadelphia: Naked Man Walks into Walmart, Steals Socks

Florida Man Mistaken For Robber While Trying to Cash $100 Check

It's not every day that you walk into a bank planning to cash a $100 check—and ultimately find yourself $3.3 million richer. That's what happened to Rodolfo Valladares, just not quite that smoothly. Valladares, sporting a Miami Heat hat, walked into a Florida Bank of America in July 2008 to cash said check. A teller mistakenly identified him as a robber who had been hitting area banks—in a Heat cap. She set off the silent alarm, and things went south for Valladares, who was handcuffed by police and kicked in the head, reports the Miami Herald.

This mistake quickly came to light: The robber was in his 60s and 145 pounds; Valladares was 46, weighed in at more than 200, and presented the check and driver's license, not a weapon. And he wasn't wearing the exact same hat. Now, he's getting a little something for his trouble, courtesy of a Miami-Dade jury. They awarded him $3.3 million in damages, having ruled that the bank was negligent in both tripping the alarm and not canceling it when they realized Valladares was a customer, not a criminal. His lawyer says Valladares is plagued by headaches, blurred vision, and PTSD—and notes that "to add insult to injury, they cashed his check after finally telling police officers it was a false alarm."


Newser: Florida Man Tried to Cash $100 Check ... Gets $3.3M

Man Jailed For Sending Valentine's Day Flowers To Estranged Wife

A 23-year-old Sheboygan man is facing a felony bail jumping charge after he allegedly violated a restraining order and sent his estranged wife flowers for Valentine’s Day.

According to a criminal complaint:

Zachary S. Zelko, 4032 Kruschke Ave., sent the flowers to her workplace just before noon on Monday. The flowers were accompanied by a card stating, “Happy Valentine’s Day, enjoy the chocolates.”

The wife immediately contacted a victim/witness specialist in the Sheboygan County District Attorney’s office, who contacted police.

Investigators went to the store where the flowers were ordered and talked to a clerk who remembered Zelko because he gave her specific instructions not to give out his name because, he told her, he was not allowed to have contact with his wife.

Zelko is charged with one count of felony bail jumping. If convicted, he could be imprisoned three years.

Zelko was charged on Jan. 17 with battery, strangulation and false imprisonment.
He was released after posting $750 bail. A condition of bail was to have no contact directly or indirectly with his wife.


Sheboygan Press: Man sends Valentine's Day flowers to estranged wife, violates restraining order

Petco Sued For Allegedly Cutting Dog's Ear Off And Gluing It Back On

Two Hawaii animal owners are suing a local Petco location, claiming that groomers at the pet shop mutilated their dogs and, in one case, tried to cover up the hack job using glue, HawaiiNewsNow reports.

Last July, Gladys Kapuwai took her Pomeranian-Maltese mix to the Kaneohe Petco for you routine grooming, but when the grandmother retrieved "Dodo," she noticed that the puppy was missing a piece of her ear.

"[She] was dried, bloody, was dry blood, everything," Kapuwai told the website. "I noticed that at home, so when I took her to the vet, the doctor had told me it looked like they tried to glue it back."

In another case, Estelle Green, the wife of attorney Michael Green, who is prosecuting both cases, picked up her dog to find that the pup's nails were cut too short and bleeding, according to the Star Advertiser.

"The dog was filthy and the tip of the dog's tail was cut off," Michael Green added.

"My dog, they offered another free grooming," Green also told HawaiiNewsNow. "I guess they wanted to take off other body parts."


Star Advertiser: Kaneohe Petco is accused of mutilating 2 dogs during grooming

Fart Joke Leads To Bomb Scare

Harold Wayne Hadley, Jr., 19, was arrested at a Mississippi junior college after he allegedly wrote a note on a piece of toilet paper on Tuesday, containing the word 'bomb.'

The note prompted 11 emergency agencies to respond to the school, but there was no bomb.

Hadley and his family contend that he was only explaining the joy of flatulating in the library.

"He was in the restroom doodling on some toilet paper ... we are from the country, and he calls passing gas, bombs," said Hadley's aunt, who wouldn't give her name to WDAM. "[He] put 'I passed a bomb in the library,' talking about passing gas, and somebody came in and found it, gave it to a teacher that recognized his hand writing and it blew all out of proportion."

Investigators wouldn't say exactly what Hadley wrote, but WDAM reports that it was no more explicit than "I passed a bomb in the library."

Hadley was arrested and held on $20,000 bail. If convicted of threatening to blow up the school, he faces 10 years in prison and a $10,000 fine, according to WAPT. His aunt says he earned straight A's at Jones County Junior College and was scheduled to graduate in May.


Huffington Post: Fart Joke Leads To Bomb Scare: Student Harold Wayne Hadley Arrested In Mississippi

Man Who Adopted His Girlfriend Is Sued By Biological Children

The polo magnate who adopted his girlfriend in an alleged attempt to protect his fortune from a lawsuit must now battle with his teenaged children who want the adoption thrown out.

John Goodman adopted his 42-year-old girlfriend in the fall, giving her a share of the more than $300 million trust he established for his two biological children -- a move that critics said was a ploy to save millions for himself if he loses an upcoming wrongful death lawsuit stemming from a car accident that killed Scott Wilson in February 2010.

The guardian of Goodman's children opened another legal front against the Polo Club Palm Beach founder by asking a judge to throw out the adoption of Heather Ann Hutchins, The Palm Beach Post reports.

The paperwork filed last week in Miami and Palm Beach County on behalf of guardian Jeffrey Goddess alleges that Goodman, 48, defrauded the court, surprised the teenagers' mother and abused adoption rules by taking his main squeeze as his legal daughter, The Post says.

The attorney for Goddess claims that Goodman kept the Oct. adoption secret from his children's guardian and his ex-wife until after Christmas. He also blames Goodman for not telling the judge overseeing the adoption proceedings that Wilson's parents were suing him.

Goodman's lawyer Dan Bachi had previously argued that adopting Hutchins was a way to ensure his children's future and was completely unrelated to the upcoming showdown with the Wilson family, according to Fox News.

A judge in the wrongful death case previously ruled that the children's trust couldn't be touched if Goodman loses the suit. Now that Hutchins is legally his third daughter she's entitled to a portion of that money - possibly worth $5 million per year. Because the trust was off-limits, its size was not known until Circuit Judge Glenn Kelley decided to reveal its worth this week, The Palm Beach Post said in a different report.

Goodman allegedly killed Wilson when he ran a red light and plowed his Bentley into the 23-year-old's car, knocking it into a river and drowning the driver. The civil suit begins in March as does Goodman's criminal trial on DUI manslaughter charges, TV station WPBF reports.


Huffington Post: John Goodman, The Man Who Adopted His Girlfriend As A Daughter, Gets Sued By His Biological Children

Burglar Breaks In, Cleans, Folds Clothes, & Cooks Dinner

Ann Murray, a South Bend, IN mother, came home Monday night around 11:30 and found a strange man in her apartment on North Lance Court. She thought she was being robbed, but instead the man, "had cooked some chicken and onions in a pot, folded my clothes and swept my floor," Murray says.

That’s right – the burglar was making dinner, had neatly organized Murray's laundry and cleaned her floors.

When asked if he did a good job, Murray laughed and said, "Yes, he drank up my orange juice, but it's cool, because he swept my floors and folded my clothes."

While Murray has a sense of humor about what happened, the strange break-in has left her and her son somewhat scared and nervous. They did not sleep in their apartment for two days and are thinking about moving to a different complex.

Police say 45-year-old Keith Davis got into Murray's apartment through an unlocked front window. When police arrived at the house, Davis was calmly sitting in a chair in Murray's living room, but wasn't making a lot of sense. He told police he lived there, but gave them a different address. He did admit to cooking food and cleaning the apartment.

“Officers spoke with Mr. Davis after advising him of his rights and him waiving the same,” according to the probable cause affidavit. “Officers also noted that the front window screen had been torn. Keith Davis advised officers that he had arrived at the home in the afternoon. He then told officers that he had woke up there in the morning. He stated that he had gotten keys to the home out of a closet and that a Korean woman had told him where they were. He further stated that he had cooked food in the home and had cleaned it up. He then told officers that he lived there, but stated a different address. He then began to talk about his time in the service and other tangential comments. When officers asked about the torn screen, he stated that he was going to pry open the window with a nail file in his pocket. He then recanted that statement. Officers had a difficult time understanding his speech and obscure tangents.”

Murray says she and the police believe Davis was on some type of drug.

"He seemed like he really thought this was his home."

Murray says Davis even put a sheet and pillow on her couch.

"He didn't take anything. Well, I guess he took a nap while the food was cooking."

And as for that food, Murray says she wasn't taking any chances.

"I didn't know what he put in there, what he mixed in there, mixed something that got him thinking this was his house. We just threw it in the trash can!" Murray laughed.

Murray believes Davis lives in the same apartment complex as she does, but several streets over. He is in the St. Joseph County Jail charged with breaking and entering. Prosecutors requested a $5,000 bond because Murray was concerned Davis might return, but the judge lowered it to $1,000. The prosecutor is requesting Davis undergo a psychological evaluation.


WSBT: Police: Man breaks into South Bend home, vacuums and folds laundry

Facebook Parenting: For The Troubled Teen

9-Year-Old Suspended For Michael Jackson's "Billie Jean" Performance

A Minnesota mom is fuming after her 9-year-old son was suspended from school for mimicking Michael Jackson's famous groin-grabbing moves during a performance of "Billie Jean" at a fundraiser last week

Mindy Boberg says the principal of St. Stanislaus in Winona, Pat Bowlin, tore into her and her son, Lenny, immediately after the boy's Jacko act on Thursday night, claiming the crotch-clutching portions constituted "gross misconduct," the Winona Daily News reported.

"[Lenny] is heartbroken," Boberg wrote on her Facebook page. "He worked so hard on this and then to have your principal scream at you immediately after."

"And as of now we are told, he's suspended indefinitely and he won't even meet with us until Monday," she wrote.

Boberg told the newspaper she wasn't sure why Bowlin ripped her boy's Gloved One gag.

The boy has performed the routine at the fundraising event for the past two years, and school officials signed off on the act during a rehearsal on Tuesday, Boberg said.

In a grainy video of the performance posted on YouTube, the crowd of grade-schoolers mostly giggle and cheer as Lenny, wearing Jackson's signature single glove, nails the King of Pop's routine from the 1983 video.

Bowlin sent an email apology to school faculty, staff and families for "one act that was clearly inappropriate."

He told the Winona Daily News that the suspension was an internal issue and plans to meet with the family on Monday.

In posts on her Facebook wall, family friends slammed the principal for going too far.

“Poor guy... You should be very proud of him, he didn't do anything wrong,” one friend wrote.

"Someone needs to moonwalk all over the principals face!!!" another supporter said.


NY Daily News: Minnesota mom fumes after 9-year-old son suspended for ‘Billie Jean’ performance

Dramatic Interpretations of 7th Graders on Facebook

Naked Man Covered In Peanut Butter And Chocolate Arrested

A naked man was arrested inside an eastern Kentucky supermarket after police found him covered in peanut butter and chocolate.

It happened January 31 at a Food World IGA in Letcher County, KY, which borders Virginia.

According to a court citation, 22-year-old Andrew Toothman was wearing only a pair of black boots.

Troopers said the store's front door was broken and that several fire extinguishers had been discharged.

Toothman appeared to be contrite. Investigators said he spelled the word "sorry" on the floor with Nyquil.

Toothman admitted breaking into the store. He was charged with burglary, criminal mischief and indecent exposure.


KAIT 8: Naked man covered in peanut butter and chocolate arrested

DuckLips Have Hit Japan

WTF? Anybody that can read Japanese care to explain?

Man Adopts His Girlfriend As His Daughter

A wealthy Florida man has adopted his 42-year-old girlfriend as a daughter in a move critics say will protect the man's assets during an upcoming lawsuit surrounding a deadly car accident.

Polo Club Palm Beach founder John Goodman, 48, adopted his longtime partner Heather Laruso Hutchins in October, The Palm Beach Post reports.

The strategy could shore up Goodman's wealth as he confronts a wrongful death lawsuit filed by the parents of Scott Patrick Wilson, The Associated Press says. Wilson was killed in 2010 when Goodman allegedly ran a stop sign. The trial begins March 27.

Goodman had previously set up a trust for his two minor children. If Wilson's parents win their civil suit, they cannot receive any compensation from the trust, The Post reports.

Hutchins, as Goodman's third legal child, is now entitled to a third of the money in the trust. However, another court could later rule that Hutchins isn't entitled to a share of the trust, Fox News reports.

A lawyer for the Wilson family claims it's a ploy for Goodman to keep money for himself. But Dan Bachi, Goodman's lawyer, told The Palm Beach Post, the adoption is to guarantee his children's future and denied that it was spurred by the lawsuit.

Florida attorney Charlotte Danciu said in an interview with TV station WPEC that Goodman is abusing the state's adoption law, which is designed to create parent-child relationships.

Circuit Court Judge Glenn Kelley, who granted attorneys for Liz and William Wilson the right to information to about the adoption, described Goodman's gambit as "border[ing] on the surreal," and said it put the court in a "legal twilight zone."

Sobriety tests revealed that Goodman was driving with a blood-alcohol level two times above the legal limit on the night Wilson died. Besides the civil case, he faces a March trial for vehicular homicide, DUI manslaughter, and leaving the scene of a crime. Those charges carry a sentence of up to 30 years in prison. He has pleaded not guilty.


Huffington Post: Man Adopts Girlfriend: John Goodman's 'Daughter' Could Protect Assets In Wrongful Death Lawsuit

Prostitute Inadvertently Calls Radio Station - Offers Sex For Money

Only in good ol' Fort Wayne, Indiana...


98.9 The Bear

Inmate Prank Adds Pig To Vermont Police Cruisers

A creative Vermont inmate has modified the state symbol that adorns police cruisers to include an image of a pig, said state officials.

One of the spots on the cow in the Vermont state crest has been changed to be the shape of a pig. The car decals are made by prisoners in St. Albans in a shop that also make state stationery and license plates.

In the 1960s, the term "pig" came to be used in derogatory fashion to describe police officers.

Lt. Paul White, station commander in Middlesex, said there are at least three of these decals on cruisers at his barracks. He said the full inventory hadn't been made. He said he was alerted by the fleet administrator who said it was first detected by a state trooper in southern Vermont.

Vermont Public Safety Commissioner Keith Flynn told the Burlington Free Press this afternoon that he became aware of the alteration earlier in the day and had asked Corrections Commissioner Andrew Pallito to explain the situation.

Flynn said initial information indicates about three dozen of the modified decals are on state vehicles.

The disclosure brought chuckles to both Flynn and Senate President Pro Tempore John Campbell, D-Windsor, who are both former police officers.

"This is not as offensive as it would have been years ago. We can see the humor," Flynn said. He said the artist has talents that could be used elsewhere. "If that person had used some of that creativeness he or she would not have ended up inside."


Burlington Free Press: Pigs on police cars? Prank by Vermont inmates adorns decals

FBI Uses Chain Saw On Wrong Door

A Massachusetts woman says the FBI used a chain saw blade to cut through her door and held her at gunpoint for at least 30 minutes before agents realized they were conducting a raid at the wrong home.

Judy Sanchez, of Fitchburg, says she awoke to heavy footsteps in the stairwell on Jan. 26 and walked into her kitchen in time to see a blade chop through her door.

"I took two steps, face the second door, and I heard the click of a gun, and saying, ‘FBI, get down,’ so I laid down on my living room floor,” Sanchez told WHDH.com. "I was screaming, ‘You have the wrong apartment, you have the wrong apartment,’ over fifty times. And then I seen the big blade coming down my door."

She says she was held face-down on the floor at gunpoint while her 3-year-old daughter Ji’anni cried in another room.

It turns out agents were after the other tenant on the floor of the multi-unit building who was suspected of dealing drugs. The raid was called Operation Red Wolf, a two-year investigation into drugs and weapons, WHDH.com reported.

Sanchez says she and her daughter now have trouble sleeping. The mom told WHDH she now sleeps with a baseball bat next to her bed.

The FBI has apologized and is paying for the damage.


WHDH: FBI targets wrong apartment in Fitchburg raid